Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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