I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
