There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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