the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
