I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize