He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
handjob tips. give me some.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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