She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
