whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
