I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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