i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Randomize
