Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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