so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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