just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize