Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
