Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
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