I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
