its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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