Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We had sex on a dog bed..
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
How naked do you want me to be?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
