If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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