Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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