eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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