yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
This beer is not sobering me up at all
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
