READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
