so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
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