I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
