Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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