Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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