Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
