Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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