you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize