Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed đ
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
If he didnât pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Dennyâs.
Liz Cheney wasnât exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying âYAS QUEENâ for in 2021 but here we are
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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