In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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