we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize