Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
