Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
