the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
