She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
