Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
