im having a threesome with these popsicles
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
