no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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