Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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