Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize