her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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