Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
