If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
