dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
