You can't special order awesome
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I am naked and annoyed.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
