We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
