Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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