Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
How many fucks given?
0.12846
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
